39. Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake Put on just a towel about your midsection and you will get into almost anywhere if you only repeat "so sorry so sorry" and retain relocating ahead.
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Don’t miss these hilarious parts of parenting assistance for dads from comedians who’ve been there.
lBefore you insult someone you need to wander a mile within their sneakers. Like that once you insult them You will be a mile away and possess their footwear!
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Hold out what would you suggest Jesus enjoys me? Did he say a little something for you? OMG I'm freaking out right now convey to me his specific phrases.
"'60billion squandered in Iraq and Afghanistan' will be the headline currently - I assume that is in addition to the trillion squandered going to begin with" -Invoice Maher
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My up coming residence could have no kitchen – just vending machines and an extremely big trash can. (By using our Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
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My spouse and youngsters are out shopping for me a father’s working day gift. Whatever they don’t know is that they by now gave me the best present of all: Silence.
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